Measly Middle Ages (Horrible Histories)
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What on earth happened in the measly Middle Ages? Well... lots of really rotten things, actually! In the Middle Ages, the world was full of wild women, mad monks, naughty knights and crazy kings and queens! So read on if you want to know... * a genuine jester's joke * why chickens had their bottoms shaved * what ten-year-old treacle was used for Plus, you can find out all about miserable Medieval monks, the dreaded Black Death, and schools that really knew how to make the kids suffer! And there are gruesome games and revolting recipes to try at home as well!
leave the hill the Normans turn and attack them on the flat ground. (Some historians believe the ‘running away’ was just a trick to get the English off the high ground.) It works. Norman archers draw fresh supplies of arrows and fire high in the air. As the English hold their shields over their heads the Norman knights charge them from the front. Harold should have listened to soldier ‘B’ and stayed where he was. He is wounded with an arrow in the eye then cut down by Norman knights. The Normans
king, Henry VI. But when he lost in battle to the French he had to go. Henry didn’t want to execute his faithful friend so he sent him off into exile. The Duke of Suffolk set sail from Ipswich but didn’t get very far. At Dover his enemies caught up with him, dragged him into a small boat and cut his head off with a rusty sword. (WARNING: Do not try this in your local park pond. Cutting someone’s head off with a rusty sword could give them a serious case of blood poisoning.) Sickly singers Not
top of the heap and peasants at the bottom. They paid for everything – they worked in his fields, worked in his castle, repaired his roads … all for free. The peasant then worked on a small patch of his own land in his spare time – not a lot of that. If the peasant made any money then he paid taxes to his lord. He paid the lord for grinding his corn, pressing his apples or baking his bread in the measly lord’s oven. The feudal system And the plagues of the 14th century certainly changed the
chieftains were upset. • John married his cousin; the Archbishop of Canterbury objected but John got the Pope to overrule him – the Archbishop of Canterbury was upset. • John arranged for the murder of his greatest rival, Arthur of Brittany in France – the French king (Philip II) was upset and went to war (though Arthur was too dead to be upset). • John picked a new Archbishop of Canterbury against the wishes of the Pope – the Pope was upset. • John raised huge taxes from the English people
than you… The only difference in the original recipe was that it said, ‘Boil the cabbages all morning’. But cabbages in the Middle Ages were tougher and needed it. Boil modern cabbages all morning and you’ll end up with school-dinner green slime. When it came to sweet dishes the rich people ate all the sugar they could get their teeth on … until the sugar rotted their teeth, of course. One flavour that was popular then is rare now – the flavour of roses. Try this rose pudding and see what you